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Archive for May, 2011

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow: How to Help Your Child Deal with Trichotillomania

Losing 100 to 300 hairs from your head every day is normal and no reason for concern. Washing, combing, styling, and even running your fingers through your hair cause many to fall out. But what if you lost enough hair in one day to create a bald spot…or if you lost nearly all your hair in a single day? That’s exactly what happens to people with trichotillomania. They pull their own hair out, strand by strand—some to the point of becoming bald.

Trichotillomania (or trich, for short) is classified as an impulse control disorder. It’s similar to obsessive-compulsive disorder, skin cutting, and even anorexia and bulimia. Trich affects women more than men, and it typically begins during adolescents, with some hair pullers being as young as age eight. While no one knows what triggers trich in people, some researchers suspect it may correlate with the onset of menses. Current statistics shows that up to 10 million Americans suffer from the affliction.

In addition to pulling hair from their head, people with trich can also pull their eyelashes, eyebrows, pubic hairs, beard, chest, and other body hairs. In severe cases, they may even eat the hair they pulled. In fact, some trich sufferers have had to have their stomach pumped because they had eaten so much hair that it obstructed their intestines.

Why Pull?

For people with trich, the sensation of pulling their own hair gives them a feeling of relief. They like the stimulation of it and the way it sounds when a hair pops out of their head. And while a regular person feels a slight sense of pain when they intentionally pull out a hair, trich sufferers claim hair pulling does not hurt; rather, it feels good.

But despite the good feelings they get from pulling hair, trich sufferers often have low self-esteem because of the bald spots and how they look. As such, they go to great lengths to hide their problem, wearing wigs, wrapping scarves on their head, and pinning their hair up to hide the bald areas.

Complicating matters is the fact that many people with trich don’t even realize they are pulling their hair. They do it when they’re focused on something else, such as reading a book or watching television, or when they’re falling asleep. Read More

A Creative Approach to Dealing with Childhood Obesity

Healthcare professionals have been calling childhood obesity a national epidemic for years, but only recently has the extent of the problem become a part of the national conversation.  Some statistics just can’t be ignored. 15 percent of American children, ages 6 to 11, are considered seriously overweight, a number that has tripled over the past thirty years.  Obesity puts children at high risk for health problems including type II diabetes, hypertension and heart disease and for becoming obese adults.

There is another harmful aspect to this problem that is less discussed — the emotional toll obesity takes on children.

Overweight children are prone to low self-esteem, negative body image, depression and anxiety.  These children are often ignored or ostracized by their peers and turn to more food for comfort. The unhealthy pattern of isolation and poor eating habits can lead to devastating long-term physical and emotional problems.

Although it is natural to self-isolate when one is feeling sad or depressed, this behavior only exacerbates existing problems.  In addition to eating more, overweight kids exercise less and become less involved in the world around them.  This pattern perpetuates feelings of shame, hopelessness, and helplessness that can develop into full-blown clinical depression if untreated.

To break this negative cycle it is important to introduce these children to the joys of using their creativity as an alternative to overeating and isolation. Guiding children to use their imagination and natural creativity will provide them with the tools to express their feelings and emotions in healthy and productive ways. This process is called The Creative Imperative. Read More

Seven Practical Gifts for College Grads

Sure, an all-expense-paid trip to Europe seems like the ultimate graduation gift. However, college students who face thousands of dollars in academic debt may need to jump on the job-hunt sooner than expected. With new financial responsibilities looming, recent grads will appreciate whatever help they can get.

To help soften the real world blow, here are seven practical gifts job-seeking college graduates will appreciate.

Resume Service

The first thing employers see is an applicant’s resume and cover letter. Unfortunately, the style of these documents has become more complex in recent years. Graduates won’t get noticed using the old method of simply listing experience by date. Cover letters are now approaching works of art, mentioning much more than that applicant is interested in the job and is a good team player, trustworthy and a hard worker.

A resume service will create updated documents so subsequent resumes and cover letters live up to modern standards. Costs run roughly $100 to $200, depending on the services you desire. It’s worth paying extra to have an expert explain the latest tricks and how graduates can alter these documents for each job. Sites like ResumeMyCareer can help you compile a professional and competitive resume at an affordable cost.

Home Furnishings

After living with cinder-block bookshelves and saggy mattresses for four years or, worse yet, being surrounded by their childhood furniture while living at home, graduates might appreciate an upgrade on everything from a couch to kitchen implements especially those moving into a new apartment to be closer to their new 9 to 5 job. You might also put together a basket of upscale bed and bath products so the grad can finally dump their dollar-store shampoo and soap.

Gift Cards

The 2011 crop of college graduates faces more debt than any other generation, so money is always a welcome gift especially to help them get through that first, unstable post-school year. Grads not comfortable with the idea of asking directly for money can create a gift card registry at CardAvenue.com to receive gift cards from hundreds of merchants in a variety of categories from apparel to food, gas and much more. Read More

Supporting Cast: You’re Not in This Alone – Surround Yourself With a Caring Birth Team

Giving birth will be one of the most memorable events of your life. It may be hard to imagine how you will respond to the powerful physical and emotional aspects of labor. But no matter how you feel, it is bound to be easier if you are surrounded by a team of people you trust before, during and after the birth.

A Doula’s Role

The word doula means “woman care-giver” in Greek; its origin refers to the female who attended to the lady of the house during childbirth. Historically, doulas were aunts, sisters, cousins or friends who helped cook and clean, as well as offered support. Today’s doulas perform similar services. There are more than 5,000 professionally trained doulas in the United States, available to any woman who wants continuous non-medical support at childbirth. Studies show that the presence of a doula at a birth results in shorter labors with fewer complications and fewer interventions, such as Pitocin, forceps or cesarean. Research shows that women supported by doulas request pain medication less frequently; they also report greater satisfaction with the birth and their partner’s participation.

Doulas provide a variety of services, depending on your personal preferences. Even though you won’t need to meet with your doula until your third trimester, it’s best to start interviewing prospective ones early, to make sure your first choice can accommodate you.

Once labor begins, doulas can help in many ways, including reminding you to listen to your inner wisdom. Having someone by your side to answer questions and let you know that you are doing well can empower you to see the light at the end of the tunnel. A doula can help communicate your preferences to other members of your support team, allowing you to relax and focus so childbirth is ultimately more satisfying. Read More

The Real-World Money Rules for Recent College Grads

When the financial crisis swept the nation, it left a trail of destruction from sea to shining sea. One reason it caused so much devastation is because at the time many Americans were living paycheck to paycheck, financing purchases they couldn’t afford.

And while many Americans have finally gotten wise to the importance of saving a buck—today, the personal savings rate is in the 5 percent range—it’s a shame that it took a crisis to make the message sink in. Younger Americans must learn from the free-spending, debt-accumulating mistakes of folks of all ages. And there’s no better time to master a frugal mind-set than when you start to spread your adult wings right out of college.

For most young people, the first time they taste complete financial independence is when they graduate college. And it’s not unusual to go a little crazy and start buying—or financing, as the case may be—what you want.

Realizing that you and only you are in charge of paying your bills, covering other expenses, and making sure you have enough left over to save can be overwhelming. Young adults need targeted financial advice to establish a firm financial footing as they start out in the “real” world. The need to learn how to invest wisely, how to improve your credit score, and how to change your spending habits if you end up unemployed.

The key to a healthy financial future is learning how to save. When you’re right out of college and getting settled into your first job, saving money can be a challenge, of course. Although you’re likely not earning a super-high income, you can live life and still buy the items you need.

How and where you spend your money is a matter of personal choice and priorities, but those choices can affect the amount of money you have to save. Here are a few tips on how to save more and spend less:

Rent smart. When you’re in your early 20s and you don’t have dependents, living in a low-cost fashion is easier than it is later in life. There are many ways to minimize costs if you are renting your living space. Two great ways to keep costs down are living with relatives or having roommates. But no matter who you are living with (and certainly if you are living alone), you should minimize your monthly rent. If you find that you’ve allowed your champagne tastes to exceed your beer budget, so long as you’re completing your current lease, there’s no reason you can’t move to a lower-cost rental. Just be sure to factor in all the costs of moving to and living in a new rental.

When it is time to re-up on your lease, don’t be afraid to negotiate. Some landlords increase their tenants’ rent no matter how good the tenant has been and regardless of the state of the economy. That said, a smart landlord doesn’t want to lose good tenants who pay rent on time. State your case through a well-crafted and polite note or personal visit. Explain how you have been a responsible tenant, always paid your rent on time, and cared for your unit, and if it’s the case, convey that your research shows comparable rentals going for less. Even if you can’t stave off the rent increase, you might be able to negotiate some improvements you value. Read More

Should You Start Planning Your Kids’ Retirement?

When our generation was growing up, we were taught about Social Security, and many of us had grandparents who were reasonably comfortable with a combination of their investment income and their government checks.

Today, not so much.

Over the last few years, we have seen the market crash and burn, and Social Security is on its way toward doing the same. So, if we’re scrambling to salvage our retirement income, imagine what it will be like for your kids. If you haven’t done that already, there is good news for you.

Parents can help their kids safeguard their retirement by starting now.

When we were just starting out in life, our parents told us to start saving money right out of the gate, but we didn’t listen. Instead, we ran up our credit card debt, spent more than we earned and bought more house than we could afford. But our kids can and should learn from our mistakes and helping them to start saving now could give them a nest egg of millions instead of thousands.

Start at 16 – Just $5,000 contributed to a Roth IRA each year for 5 years starting at age 16 could be worth more than a million by the time they reach age 65. In a Roth IRA all that growth would be tax-free when withdrawn.

10 Percent Rule – Everyone should save a minimum of 10 percent of their take home pay.

Shelter Early - Ideally, you should save in a Roth IRA account at the beginning of your career. When you reach your peak earnings (usually around age 40), switch to a tax-deferred account like a 401(k).

Fun or Fund? – Take half of what you have been spending on gifts (toys, games, etc.) and invest it in a mutual fund for your child.

Birthday Booster – Encourage friends and relatives to contribute to the mutual fund account you’ve started instead of buying gifts for birthdays and holidays.

Every Little Bit Helps – Contributing small amounts on a regular basis is a better strategy than waiting to accumulate a larger sum. Get in the habit of saving something regularly.

Use the Refund – Let the government help. Currently the child tax credit is $1,000 per child until they reach age 17.  Discipline yourself to save the credit when it is returned to you as a refund.

It doesn’t take a lot to give your kids long-term security. The magic of compounded interest can do more of the heavy lifting as long as you start early and contribute often.

Rick Rodgers, Certified Financial Planner, Chartered Retirement Planner Counselor, Certified Retirement Counselor, and member of the National Association of Personal Financial Advisers, is Founder and CEO of Rodgers & Associates and author of the new book “The New Three-Legged Stool: A Tax Efficient Approach To Retirement Planning” (www.TheNewThreeLeggedStool.com).

Rick’s expertise in the investment and financial advisory profession began with one of the big Wall Street firms in 1984. Twelve years later, he founded Rodgers & Associates as a way to concentrate on financial planning. His vision was to help families prepare for a worry-free retirement through the creation and conservation of their wealth. Today, as a leading retirement expert and personal wealth adviser to high net worth individuals, Rick provides integrated financial, tax, and investment strategies, retirement planning, executive compensation, estate and charitable planning.

 

Keeping Kids Hooked on Reading

Developing a love of reading in our four children is of paramount importance to us and is critical to most parents. But “how to” is very elusive. Why doesn’t my second child love to read when it seems everyone else’s children are avid and engaged readers?

When my son was two, he would grab his favorite book (“We’re Going on a Bear Hunt”) and jump on my lap. We read it in silly voices and never skipped a word or missed a page. It was memorized and cherished and I felt happy at the prospect of having a good reader on my hands. But when he went to kindergarten and was asked to read every night — he started to protest! And, when he went to second grade and was asked to keep a reading journal, he became a “short-cut taker”. As parents, we needed a strategy! How could we get our son back to being hooked on reading?

As children grow, there is a critical step that occurs. The step is when the child switches from “learning to read” to “reading to learn.” This is why, as parents, we strive to create a love of reading and a core competence in reading in our kids. When children are “learning to read” it can be a wonderful journey with their excited teachers and parents. When they begin to have Science and other subjects (starting in around 2nd grade), kids have to use their reading skills to understand directions, read materials and complete work. So how can we grow engaged readers who can later become great learners?

My husband and I had an idea. Our kids are addicted to electronic devices and have been since they could ask for a DS. Every gift list now includes a request for a Kindle, an iPad, an iTouch, or an iPhone. We say no to many of these gift requests, as electronic devices are expensive. And, we worry that when our kids are on their electronics, they do not glance at the scenery from a car window, engage in table conversation or even utter complete sentences. But what if instead of being the “electronics police”, we could use them toward scholastic achievement, most specifically reading?

We started to research and found the digital revolution offers even more than we hoped to get our kids hooked back on reading. All children excel and struggle in different areas. They learn differently and they may need to read differently to increase their satisfaction and confidence. Children usually like what they are good at and do not like what they struggle with. Today’s children feel very comfortable with technology, especially their hand-held electronics. And, the biggest trend in building reading skills and reading comprehension in the best schools is using a multimedia approach. At more and more schools, using the computer and increasingly, electronic tablets in addition to traditional books is a core piece of the reading curriculum. Read More

Summer is a Child’s Opportunity to Learn

For most children, summer is a time to leave classes and homework behind. However, when they return to school in the fall after the long summer break, students can find themselves struggling to catch up. Summer should not be an excuse to put kids’ brains on hiatus—in fact, it’s the perfect time for a different kind of learning.

Parents can play a key role in reinforcing learning on an ongoing basis. Here are simple practical tips for integrating continuous learning into fun, family activities all summer long:

Summer Math Tips for Kids

We’re surrounded by words and numbers every day. Here are a few ideas for summer math learning which can be adapted to a family’s needs:

• Grocery store math. Counting, estimating, and making change are good math exercises. What can we get for $10.00? Will you count the change for me, please? Let me know when we’ve reached fifteen items in the cart, please.

• Menu math. What’s the most expensive meal on the menu? What’s the least expensive? We have $20.00 to spend – what can we get?  What’s the proper tip?

• Kitchen math. Practice fractions by using recipes or reading cookbooks.  Practice numbers by counting the cutlery needed for dinner.  Measuring ingredients is a perfect math lesson. Don’t tell them, though.

• Map math. What’s the distance from home to our destination? How long will it take us if we travel the speed limit? What’s the most direct route? What do you think is the most scenic route? Why?

• Money math. Teach about making change. Count change in a piggy bank. How many ways can I make 45 cents? Open a savings account and watch the amount rise with deposits and interest. Talk about the advantages of saving for a big purchase or for a rainy day.

• Reading and writing math. Read books about math and mathematicians.

• Calendar math. Count down the days to special events like the first day of school, birthdays, holidays, vacations, assignments, and appointments.

• Game math. Use cards, dominoes or dice (“math cubes”) to reinforce counting, addition, subtraction, multiplication, or division skills.  Play Chutes and Ladders, Monopoly, and other games that encourage counting. Together, do the Sudoku puzzles in the daily paper.

• Computer math. There’s no shortage of cool game and instructional websites.

• Beach math. Count starfish and seashells. Umbrellas and pizza joints. Flip flops and beach balls. Dig holes, then encourage kids to fill one-quarter, one-half, three-quarters with water or seashells.  Draw geometric shapes in the sand – circles, squares, rectangles, triangles – and identify them.

Summer Reading

Reading is an adventure that begins early in a child’s life and should extend beyond the classroom. Summer months are the perfect time to make reading fun and inspire children to develop a lifelong friendship with books. Here are some tips that parents can use this summer:

• Offer a variety of publications (magazines, newsletters, books, etc.) so kids can make their own literary choices. Availability is key.

• Encourage your kids to read everything and read aloud – food labels, movie disclaimers, street signs, store names, music lyrics, restaurant menus, others.

• Make mail time fun. Give young readers “junk mail” and ask them to circle the words that they recognize. Become the family’s mailman. Ask your child to read the names printed on the mail and have him or her “deliver” the mail to the specific family members. Read More

Ten Tall Tales About Bedwetting

It turns out that conventional wisdom isn’t always so wise when it comes to bedwetting. Here are ten myths to leave behind on your journey to dry nights.

1. You have to wait for your child to outgrow bedwetting. There are safe, effective techniques to help your child stop wetting the bed, so there is no need to wait what might be years for the problem to “go away” on its own.

2. Most bedwetting children have mental or physical problems. Only three in a hundred children who urinate while sleeping have a physical or urologic cause for it. Likewise, psychological problems rarely cause bedwetting.

3. If a child is a sound sleeper, a bedwetting alarm won’t work for her. It’s true that bedwetting children are less likely to be woken by external stimuli than their parents…and that’s okay! Initially, the alarm is meant to prompt Mom or Dad to accompany their child to the bathroom.

4. If your child doesn’t tell you he’s bothered by his bedwetting, he probably doesn’t care if he’s wet. The fact is, no child wants to wake up in a wet bed. Your child might not have spoken up because he’s embarrassed or because he doesn’t believe anything can be done.

5. Bedwetting is nothing but a pesky problem that will eventually go away. You might not have thought about it, but bedwetting can impact your family financially and emotionally. For example, one or two extra loads of laundry can cost up to $700 a year! Furthermore, bedwetting can negatively affect your child’s self-esteem. Don’t brush bedwetting off—it’s worth the effort to overcome it now. Read More

The Waiting Game

Patience is truly a virtue after nine long months, especially when you’re a few weeks or days from your due date. The swollen feet, extra pounds and late-night bathroom trips can take their toll. Wouldn’t it be easier to just schedule your baby’s birth and get the show on the road?

Elective induction offers the satisfaction of knowing your baby’s birth date in advance, but it might not go as planned. Sometimes women scheduled for induction are bumped from the hospital agenda because the staff is busy. Plus, induction doubles your risk of cesarean birth. The major risk of elective induction is that your baby may not be ready to be born. Experts agree that a normal pregnancy lasts between 38 and 42 weeks, and research indicates that the baby actually initiates the labor process. Once his lungs are fully mature, he releases a protein that tells his mother’s body that it’s time. A baby born even a few weeks early is at an increased risk for breathing problems, admission to special-care nurseries and breastfeeding difficulties.

INDUCTIONS & INTERVENTIONS

An induction usually requires more interventions than a normal birth. You will need IV fluids and continuous electronic fetal monitoring, making you less mobile. Also, artificial contractions may peak sooner and be more intense than natural ones. You are therefore more likely to request an epidural, which increases your chances of needing forceps or vacuum assistance, developing a fever and/or requiring a cesarean section. Plus, the most common medication used for induction (Pitocin) interferes with the release of hormones that promote normal birth and breastfeeding.

Because of these risks, some hospitals do not offer or limit elective inductions. “It seems that, if we are too cavalier about inducing labor for the convenience of either the mother or the provider, we are ignoring the baby’s essential contribution and asking him to participate even when he is not ready,” says Biddy Fein, CNM, who attends births at Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston. “We accept this as necessary when the risks of continuing pregnancy outweigh the benefits. But in all other circumstances, we should be respectful of nature’s plan for the initiation of labor and the exquisite interplay between mother and baby.”

BABY MAKES THE DATE

If there are valid medical reasons for labor induction, your health-care provider will weigh the benefits of immediate delivery versus continuing the pregnancy for the health of your baby. But if you are like the majority of women who do not have reasons for induction, the safest option for you and your baby is to wait for labor to begin on its own. Your baby may decide to come on his due date (although less than 10 percent of babies do), but you may want to plan for a later date in case your pregnancy does extend to 42 weeks.

If your pregnancy lasts longer than expected, try not to worry. Continue normal activities and remember that you are giving your baby the best start by allowing him to decide when he is ready to make his grand entrance into the world.

Debby Amis, RN, BSN, CD (DONA), LCCE, FACCE, is a Lamaze certified childbirth educator.

Lamaze International (www.lamaze.org) promotes a natural, healthy and safe approach to pregnancy, childbirth and early parenting practices based on the best and most current medical evidence available.  Knowing that pregnancy and childbirth can be demanding on a woman’s body and mind, Lamaze serves as a resource for information about what to expect and what choices are available during the childbearing years.  This article was originally published in Lamaze Magazine.

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